


The eyes can be fooled too easily

by MidgardianNerd



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dorks in Love, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Writer!Ben
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-05-16 07:20:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14806871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidgardianNerd/pseuds/MidgardianNerd
Summary: When Ben woke up this morning, he wasn't expecting what he had to face.





	The eyes can be fooled too easily

**Author's Note:**

  * For [idrilhadhafang](https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/gifts).
  * Inspired by [First Steps](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14636208) by [idrilhadhafang](https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang). 



> For Idrilhadhafang who needed fluff after a rough night. 
> 
> The boys and I are always happy to be her obedient servants.

When he woke up this morning, his hand was going through the cold mattress, looking for another body but he found nothing. The fear he felt deep down in his bones was enough to make him opening his eyes. When he saw the emptiness next to him, Ben felt a coldness taking over with whole body. He could remember last night. When he finally invited Poe into his flat after their eight date. He remembered how stressed he was and how Poe helped him to relax with a beautiful smile. He remembered how Poe took his hand when he lead him to his bedroom. He remembered how gentle Poe’s fingers were against his chest when he was taking off Ben’s shirt. He remembered the feeling of Poe’s weight on his own body while the young man was cherishing his nipples with long kisses. He remembered the sensation of Poe’s bare skin against his and the shivers which ran along his spine when Poe put a finger in him, with praising words whispered in his ear. He remembered the slight sting he felt when Poe slid in him before the young man pounded in him and the pleasure took over him. 

He remembered all of this. And how Poe took him in arms after he slid out of him, breathing hard against Ben’s mouth before telling him he was wonderful and how much he liked him. And how the kiss they shared before falling asleep tasted wonderful. And how Poe looked at him so much love and devotion than Ben felt paralyzed. He remembered everything about this first night together. He remembered Poe. So why Poe wasn’t there? With him? Why?

Did Poe lie? Did he just want to sleep with Ben? No! Ben couldn’t believe that. Poe was such a great guy. He couldn’t be that cruel. But he could be disappointed. And he probably was. He probably wasn’t expecting Ben to be so inexperienced, such a virgin. He was probably not having such pleasure as he affirmed it yesterday. He was just kind, telling to Ben what Ben wanted to hear. 

Ben could feel the tears in his eyes and alone in this cold bedroom, he let them falling. He lost Poe. He lost his fucking chance for happiness. Poe was too perfect for him. Too good for him. He has been so patient with Ben and Ben didn’t give him anything worthy back. 

Angrily, Ben whipped off the tears from his cheeks before going up, not caring to put clothes on and he walked off the bedroom, ignoring the soreness of his arse. He didn’t want to see anymore Poe’s presence there. Because the only thing he could see was Poe missing and it was like someone was punching his heart without stopping. He didn’t want to feel like that. He didn’t want to be hurt. He wanted to hurt. He wanted to punch and break and take out his anger on something. The glasses in his kitchen would make it. So Ben decided to go there, far away from his bed he couldn’t bare to look at. 

 

* * *

 

“I love this view!” could be heard in the silent flat and Ben stopped to walk immediately. 

 

When he turned around towards the voice, Ben froze. Front of his eyes, Poe was there, sitting on the couch in his flat. The sun coming from the window behind him was making his hair looking shiny and soft and his skin had a lovely golden shade. He was looking at him with bright eyes and a tender smile was on his lips, the same lips who kissed Ben all the night. 

Ben could feel the tears coming back, from relief this time. He was so sure that Poe walked out of his life that he felt so ashamed to have thought Poe could behave like that. To see him there, getting comfortable in Ben’s space, wrapped in a red plaid shirt who belonged to Ben and to his father before him. He looked so beautiful. And Ben wasn’t deserving him. He was so used to have awful things in his life that he couldn’t believe it when something so wonderful as Poe was happening to him. He wasn’t deserving Poe. Poe deserved someone better than him with all his anger issues, emotional baggage and family problems. 

Ben tried to swallow back his sobs but it was too late. He was now naked in the middle of his living room, crying and making a fool of himself front of Poe. If the man still wanted him before, sure than now, he would reconsider it. Ben put his hand on his eyes, trying to hide his tears and falling. He left out a shaky breath. 

 

“Ben!” called out Poe, worried but the other man was unable to look at him. “Come to me, please!”

 

Ben looked through his fingers to see Poe looking at him, his features clenching in tension due to Ben’s state, and he was tending his hand towards Ben. With faltering steps, Ben walked to him and once he was next to the couch, Poe took his hands, entwining their fingers and his thumb brushing Ben’s back hand. 

 

“Talk to me!” whispered Poe and Ben took of his own hand from his own face, looking down, unable to look Poe in the eyes, feeling ashamed with himself. 

“I...I...I thought you left.” sobbed Ben, trying to swallow his tears but he felt so afraid in the moment and he hadn’t been that much afraid since a long time, since his father left the family house and Ben was so sure he wouldn’t come back for him. Ben should stop to make assumptions because in his father’s case and in Poe’s case, he was so wrong. 

 

He felt a sweet kiss on his knuckles and he finally looked at Poe. The other man was looking at him with sadness and Ben felt horrible because he didn’t want to make Poe sad but he was so fucked up, he was unable to think rationally and Poe would realize it and he will leave him and let Ben alone to take care of his broken heart and…

 

“Breathe!” said Poe, now on his knees on the couch, Ben’s face in his hands, his thumbs stroking Ben’s cheekbones. 

 

Ben took a deep breath, inhaling and expiring few more times to make his heart finding back a normal pace. With Poe’s skin against his to ground him, it was easier than it never has been before. When he was finally calm again, he looked at Poe, shy. 

 

“I’m sorry.” he whispered, biting down his lower lip to make it stop trembling. 

“For what?” asked Poe, a soft smile on his lips while he was petting with adorating Ben’s hair. 

“Because I...I thought the worst of you.” confessed Ben, looking away, a tear rolling down his cheek.

“And you definitely had the right to think that.” answered Poe, softly and Ben shook his head hard, denying Poe’s kindness to him.

“No!” exclaimed Ben and Poe grabbed hard his chin to make him stop. “You always have been to good with me and-”

“And you will learn to trust me. With time.” replied back Poe, his fingers caressing Ben’s lips. “We have all the time in the world Ben. I’m not going anywhere.” he added, putting his forehead against Ben’s, his nose poking Ben’s. 

“You can’t promise me that.” sobbed Ben.

“I can.” said Poe. “And I do.” he added before kissing softly Ben, his fingers sliding in Ben’s hair to bring him closer to him, their chests against each other. 

 

Ben could protest, like he always did when someone seemed to care about him. Or he could begin to trust Poe and to believe him. He decided it was time to take a risk. Slowly, he slid his arms around Poe’s waist and lost himself in the kiss. He could feel Poe as much as he felt it last night. The hand in his hair, the other hand moving in soothing caress on his shoulders, Poe’s hard chest against his and the plaid shirt pressing between them. He could feel Poe’s breath coming through his nostrils against his cheek and Poe’s hair tickling his forehead. When they separated, Poe was looking at him with pure love and Ben offered a shy smile, not used to have someone looking at him like that, except for his father. 

 

“I’m still sorry.” whispered Ben and Poe chuckled softly before caressing Ben’s jawline with his nose before sniffing hard behind Ben’s hair. 

“That’s okay.” whispered back Poe. “You made a mistake and it will not be the only one.” he added. “But I will do mistakes too. And I hope you will forgive me when it will happen.” he said, looking at Ben, less confident than usually. 

“I doubt you can do mistake.” answered Ben. 

“You will also have to learn that I’m human and I can do mistakes or I will always disappoint you and I don’t want you to dump me. Because I like you very very much.” said Poe, smiling shyly but Ben could see the fear in his eyes. 

“I love you.” blurted out Ben and Poe was a little bit surprised. “I know it’s too fast but I love you and I’m...I’m sure of myself.” he breathed out, rising up his chin, maybe a little bit defiant. 

“I’m glad you are.” answered Poe seriously. “Because I’m sure I love you too.” he added, letting a huge grin spreading his lips. 

 

To hear these words in Poe’s mouth, for him, Ben knew he could try to write about what he felt, he would never make justice to it. Because it was wonderful. And terrifying at the same time. And for the first time in his life, everything seemed...right. Ben could really become used to it. He wanted to become used to it. 

Ben took Poe in his arms, Poe’s chin on his shoulder, Ben’s nose buried in Poe’s hair. And like that, they shared this moment, the promise of something new between them. Ben kissed Poe’s temple, feeling like peace could be something regular now and not just coming in waves in his life. 

He looked down and saw that with his grip around Poe’s waist, the plaid shirt wasn’t covering anymore Poe’s arse and Ben tried to hide his smile in Poe’s shoulder. Then, his eyes got caught by pages spread on the couch. He felt himself freezing. He knew these pages. He knew them because he wrote them. 

 

“Poe?” called out Ben, Poe still cuddling against him.

“Mmmmh?” mumbled Poe, kissing softly Ben’s neck and it was kinda distracting. 

“What are you reading?” he asked and he could feel Poe freezing in his arms, his heart beating hard against Ben’s chest. He sighed before pushing himself away from Ben’s body. 

“First mistake.” whispered Poe before looking up at Ben. “I know I should have asked you but I saw my name on the page and my eyes got caught and I began to read and I couldn’t stop that why I wasn’t with you in the bed when you woke up and I’m sorry…” began to ramble Poe but Ben cut him by putting an hand on his mouth. 

 

Ben sighed. It wasn’t the first time that he was messing Poe and Jacob’s names since Jacob was Poe in Ben’s mind. He knew he should have been angry because he never let anyone reading his writing but the only thing he could feel was fear about what Poe could think about it. He wanted him to like it. And his crazy dreams, he wanted Poe to be proud of him. But it was probably asking too much. 

 

“What do you think about it?” asked Ben, nervous. 

“I love it.” whispered Poe with a soft smile after having take off Ben’s hand from his mouth.

“You’re saying this to be gentle.” sighed Ben, biting nervously his lips.

“Ben!” said Poe, looking straight in Ben’s eyes. “My mum is a scifi lover and believe me, she read me to me almost every scifi book published in the last 40 years when she put me to bed. So I think I can be objective when I tell you that your writing is one of the best things I’ve read in all my life.” added Poe, serious. 

 

Ben felt himself sighing in relief. He could believe Poe. In his eyes, he has the feeling that Poe was honest with him and would always be. 

 

“You believe me.” smiled brightly Poe and he looked so happy that Ben wondered when he would stop to fall for Poe at every smile he threw to him. Probably never. 

“I do.” whispered Ben, smiling softly. 

 

Both men leaned towards each other in a same move, letting their mouths finding each other. Ben felt the nervousness in his stomach definitely gone now that he confessed to Poe his true feelings and now that he knew that it was reciprocated. He could see Poe in his life for a longer time that he dared to imagine. They separated but stayed cuddling in the other’s arms.

 

“Can I ask you a favor?” mumbled Ben against Poe’s shoulder.

“Sure.” answered Poe, his hand petting Ben’s hair. 

“Could you not let me waking up alone? At least, not yet.” asked Ben, his fingers clenching Poe’s plaid shirt.

“Alright.” replied Poe and Ben could feel his smile against his own skin and he felt relieved. 

 

Then, Ben tightened his embrace around Poe’s waist to lift him off the couch. Poe screamed slightly in surprise, his arms wrapping around Ben’s neck before chuckling when his lover carried him towards the kitchen. Poe wrapped his legs around Ben’s waist while the other man put his arms under Poe’s naked arse and Poe felt his skin burning with desire. 

 

“What are you doing?” chuckled Poe when Ben made him rest on the counter. 

“Well! I’m a gentleman.” said Ben with a wink. “And my father taught me to always make breakfasts for my lovers.” he added with a cheeky smile and a fond glance that Poe knew it wasn’t really for him but for his father. 

“Are you trying to bribe me with food?” asked Poe, amused. 

“It depends.” shrugged Ben, already working on their breakfast. “Does it work?” he asked, looking at Poe from the corner of his eyes. 

“Well! I would tell you that after tasting it.” answered Poe, cheeky. “So, try to impress me Solo!” added Poe with a wink.

“I thought I already had your heart.” snorted Ben before smiling. 

“But I still could give you my body.” answered Poe, undoing the buttons of the plaid shirt to expose his chest to Ben’s hungry eyes. “If you want it of course!” added Poe, fakely nonchalant. 

“I try to be a gentleman!” whined Ben and Poe laughed loudly before wrapping his legs around Ben to bring him back against him, sliding his arms on Ben’s shoulders and the young man put his hands on Poe’s waist, his thumbs stroking Poe’s flanks. 

“I take everything from you Ben.” smiled Poe, kissing along Ben’s jawline. “Gentleman, naughty boy, cook.” he said, biting slightly Ben’s jaws and the other man moaned. 

Ben captured Poe’s mouth in a hungry kiss and Poe gladly let him taking the lead. They were ready to take advantage of the counter under Poe when Poe’s stomach rumbled loudly and Ben began to giggle against Poe’s mouth. Soon, he was laughing hard and Poe couldn’t help to laugh with him, so happy to see Ben feeling that relaxed and knowing that he had a part in him. 

 

“A cook for the moment.” said Ben after his laugh quieted down before he left a quick peck on Poe’s lips. 

“The reward is still up though.” answered Poe, his fingers sliding along Ben’s chest and giving shivers to his lover. 

 

Ben nodded before going back to work, throwing shy looks to Poe from time to time, blushing front of Poe’s dorky loving expression. And when Poe bit down in the first pancake Ben gave him, Poe knew he deserved his reward. Not that Poe wasn’t willing to give him. After all, he could be a gentleman too. 

**Author's Note:**

> My Tumblr: @midgardiannerd


End file.
